Painful thoughts are Mindful thoughts

Some people make you come to life
It’s like they make you feel so much more
And they do it by hurting you

Some things never change

Loved the lyrics...check it out

After all this time I still miss you everday
The same world spins ’round
I guess some things never change
Sometimes I go out but it never feels the same
I still look for you
Baby some things never change

When I said I’d love you for eternity
I just never knew how true those words would be
Just an old love song
Just a mention of your name
My heart breaks in two again
I guess some things never change

Maybe someday someone else will set me free
Until then I’ll live with your loves legacy
And I’ll keep holding on
Hoping you’ll come back someday
You can rest assured
Baby some things never change
Girl I’m still in love with you
I guess some things never change

I still love you



" In past few years I have realized that in life there are some things, some moments which are so special to you that they never change and are very close to your heart no matter what happens. May be due to circumstances you don't show them but they definelty exist and in the same form. But surely life changes so fast that sometimes somethings change so fast that you don't even realize that they have... And by the time you realise that they are changing they are already gone so far that they can't be undone now. "

Strangers !

Sometimes, more than the people you've known for years together in your life, strangers can manage to make a huge impact on you, in the most insignificant ever you can ever imagine. Say , your walking on the road and a stranger might just come upto you to check with the time ,he or she might manage to make a BIG difference in your life, in the weiredest way ever possible ,in those few fraction of seconds . The funniest part is , they dont have the slightest clue that they've made such an impact on you, so much that you'd never forget it through out your life...!
I was sleeping by my window side ( as usual ) one fine night . It was 2.30 in the morning and I was struggling to sleep big time. All of a sudden, I hear vocies. I then happen to see a bunch of guys , sloshed big time , in the next buliding's terrace. They were all wobbling and swaying. Was so funny I thought.
I could barely see their faces , it was all in the dim moon light. They were like 6 to 7 guys and all drunk. I could hear them crystal clear since it was like 3 in the morning. Taaginappudu nijaalu bayataki ostaayi antaru kada..lol..best example idenemo. They started abusing each other in the cutest way possible ! One of the guy was constantly on fone so the rest 5 guys were all falling on each other, sleeping in each others laps...sreaming, dancing..doing all sorts of things possible. They were joking around so bad with all the abusive words possibly used, I so couldnt stop laughin man ! Somehow, that day I wasnt in a good moods and thanks to these guys that they jus put me into peels of laughter and lightened my mood up. These guys showed what true friends were all about. The way they were with each other , joking around, emotional talks ( when they went Ill stand by you no matter what mama..lol ) , giving space to the guy who was on fone (with his girl for sure ! ) and yet being with him at the same time , everything was so fabulous ! I loved it. It was a mix of fun and an emotional night. Trust me , that very night , changed my life , changed the whole outlook of how I see things . In those few hours, they must have done things which may seem so simple , normal and so routine-ish to everyone..but for me it was a lot more than that.In every little thing what they did , there was so much meaning behind it and so much of emotion underneath it .. I could so feel it..gawd ! It jus moved me . I felt new all of a sudden , I've become a new person after this paricular incident. I waited for them to come the next night and entertain me all over again and teach me what life's all about, but alas ! They never came back. How I wish I could just run into them and be like, Guyz ! You people made a huge difference in mah life..how I wish ! how I wish..
In life , tiny things often matter the most, sitting and having coffee by the window side when its raining , laughing around with your friends and doing nuthing at all but laugh and laugh , being by your grandparents side and helping them in doing things they cant , taking your mom and dad for dinner with your first sal, getting up from the bed only to realise there a lot more time and sleeping back again..pakkinti sahaan aa babyish innocent cutie cutie smile icchinappudu..I donno..veetillo unna aanandam inka vere vaatillo undadu emo and daaaaaaaaaaattt..these people made me realise ( eh in the most weirdest way possible but yeah ! wateva ! )

Networking anddddddddd Networking !

Argh ! Its really really sad that you just dont get to meet people of your wave lenghts. Im dying to find a person with who I can have a good conversation with. Its natural for people to just join a conversation casually and talk about things in General , people like this , are everywhere ! But its like so rare to find people with who you can have amazing interesting conversations for I network a lot !! Finding a common ground and building on that , then discussion, debates, disagreements..ah ! I'JUS LOVE IT.

There was this person I knew for like 2 and a half years or something, Man ! We adored each other ! He was one hell of a conersationalist ! I jus knew what he was gonna type or say the very next moment and he knew the same with me .. ! We jus loved our conversations. He exactlyyyy knew when he had to laugh, when he had to smile, knew when I joked and when I dint, our sense of humour,our wavelengths,EVERYTHING matched ! To worsen the amount of perfectness, even his tone, was like so perfect, he jus knew what to speak in which tone..lol ! oh gawd ! He was PERFECT ! We had amazzzinggg conversations for like years ! I jus miss all those ( Its been 3 years or so now so kinda lost touch ) . Is it that hard to find a person whoz a good conversationalist for heavens sake ?!!?


Every time I meet someone new , I strike a conversation and expect them to react in one obvious way but turns out to be the other. Argh ! ANNOYZ ME !! The thing is I like to know a little bit about a lot of things. This gives me an advantage in conversations , no matter where the conversation goes. Some people manage to talk for like 10 to 15 mins and get drained out.They just donno how to steer the conversation back and that's the reason why I've hardly had good convoz from past few.. eh..years I can say ! Its just that I wanna have that plain enjoyment and pleasure of self-expression and interaction with other people. One of the most enjoyable things we ever do is to spend time with people we like and whose company we find stimulating and dattttttt..I' ve never found :( Miss ya VT ! bhooo hooooo

Restless...Argh !!

Now, I don't quite know what's up with me the last few days, but I've been feeling rather uninspired and restless. I feel in need of some excitement, I just have no idea what kind of excitement that should be.

I would like to feel really passionate about something, but I just don't know about what. It's a rather frustrating feeling.Nothing that makes me jump out of bed in the mornings to go " get it ". I have everything around me, mah friends, family, mah work and yet I feel restless.Maybe it's just that I don't feel like I'm growing enough as a person. Anyway, it does prove that even whilst living in paradise can you can feel 'blah' from time to time ; )

Thank you !

Ok guyz..I had like readers who've been really really nice to me.Ive been gettin comments and also mails, from em..But one thing is dat..U Guyz have been commenting ANONYMOUSLY ! I'd love to know you guyz ! I'd be really glad ! I jus had a comment on 50 things which made me write this..Whoever u r ..Uve made my day ! Thanks for all the wonderful welcoming comments.I want you guyz to know I really appreciate the effort you’ve guyz have gone through to be part of the conversation. I didn't expect that so many people were involved. Keep them coming !

Have you ever....

Have you ever told someone things in confidence so they could get to know you better and they have used those very same statements against you?

Have you ever loved someone enough to let them completely misuse the "power" you have given them?

Have you ever been hurt so much that your insides feel like they are in a washing machine?

Have you ever been so angry that everything you see is tainted in red?

Have you ever presented a completely contradictory picture of yourself to the world whilst feeling something completely different on the inside?

Have you ever spent two whole months drinking every night to forget what happened - what you let happen?

Have you ever felt tears slide down ur face as you watch something on tv that reminds u of someone?

Have you ever felt haunted?

Have you ever looked evil directly in the eye whilst it did everything in its power to destroy you?

Have you ever felt so drained that you don't even have the strength for revenge?

Have you had this happen to you over and over again?

Have you any idea of the sense of rejection, insecurity, loss, fragility, pain, ugliness it can fill a person with??

Have you any idea the unsurmountable amount of strength it takes for you to move on from all of this??

Have you ever kept it all inside the confines of the walls of your mind??

Hmm.

I HAVE.